Don’t let your struggle create your identity… Attack Fear

11 Dec

This is going to be the most hardest thing I’ve ever had to face! I’m trying to be as honest with myself without worrying about what anyone says (since I’m making my personal issues public)…

but! before I do, I want you all to know that I’m crazy enough to do this because deep DEEP inside I want to become better so I can become a great life coach that serves and helps everyone overcome that hardest of obstacles like I did. I don’t guarantee I will overcome all of it, but I will try my best…

For years since middle school I’ve let my struggle create my identity. This is the reason why I’ve put off from pursuing my dream of becoming a life coach. I’ve told myself I don’t got what it takes, that I’m not good enough to be a coach because the limits in my mind won’t help me be a good coach; that I’m not in good shape to serve others…

Slowly these past 9 months I’ve had to myself out of a relationship have really helped me find myself, lose weight, meet new people, connect with my father again, help my closest family & friends, and meet some very special people who I give credit to for guiding & believing in me at my worst times.

I’ve come to realize that:

1. All the breakups, friendships lost, moments of anxiety, self-doubt, gaining weight, going broke, losing connection with family have humbled me and made me the peaceful person I am today that is able to help others! I was stripped from everything, and because of someone’s enlightenment talks I was able to realize how thankful I could be for what I have- everything! I talk about this in the other blog post: losing everything, you’ve gained it all

Even with all this enlightenment and multiple epiphanies I still felt like something was holding me back..I still had fears so I dug a little deeper and went as far as analyzing the dream I had the other day…The dream I had a while ago came back again.

So vivid… & just to keep it short and go back to the topic I’ll say this: it was about me running away from people with guns trying to shoot at me. I always fought back though, and never let myself die in that movie I played in my head.. (I don’t watch action movies). I’ve had this same dream for years. As dramatic as this may seem I knew how real it was in my own life.

It was a direct reflection of my fears.. fears I was running away from.

The two fears that have help me back all my life from truly being the best I could be is:

  • Rejection
  • Being embarrassed publicly

It has affected me so much that I have changed how I act around different kinds of personalities & I’ve gotten nervous speaking about my ideas in business meetings with big groups of people.

For years, my ego has told me to ignore my weaknesses and focus on my strengths  I did that & grew but then the glass door of fear stopped me from going to the next level every time.

I’ve come to realize that focusing on your fears is what will help you become successful faster.

Here’s why: Fears are what will eventually come around and delay getting to where you want to go. Although focusing on fears is the worst feeling, resolving them so that you are fearless is what gets you to break free and be limitless!

I’ve sometimes come off as misunderstood or transparent when I’m under pressure all because of these damn fears!

So to finally let my mind convince itself that these two fears are not as bad as they make me feel, I have to face getting rejected and being embarrassed..

The plan:

  1. Enroll in toastmasters and start speaking publicly
  2. Start speaking to people I don’t know at supermarkets and malls
  3. Attending networking events and business meetings talking to business owners about marketing
  4. Doing things that make me happy and confident: dancing, doing active things, going to the gym, helping others

Simple… but I’ve only done #4 and it hasn’t been 100% effort!

So there it is, my heart wide open and laid out in public. Next post will be me starting off with one of the 4 plans and writing about how it went.

I’d like to hear your views on this, share your experience or thoughts with me 🙂

P.S: I want to be a bad ass like Will Smith. He talks about fear in this video at 8:33– simply amazing!

attack fear - will smith


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